Back in Black
I continued my trek through the goblin-infested dungeon forest. In the distance, I watched as a raven approached. It didn't seem like it intended to attack me, so I figured it wasn't some new type of monster. I figured that it was probably just one of the expats from Noah's Ark doing its own thing. However, once it got a bit closer, I heard a very British-sounding voice calling out to me.
"Good day, my lord. I am very relieved indeed to see a human. Might you be able to tell me exactly where I am? To tell the truth, I have seen the most frightful creatures about."
Honestly, I was probably too used to talking animals by this point, thanks to spending so much time with my tanuki Aniki and Anego. So, without so much as missing a beat, I casually replied.
"Howdy, fella. I couldn't tell ya exactly where we are right now... but suffice to say, you're a long, long way from home."
The raven landed on a nearby tree branch before tilting his head to the side and curiously studying me with his beady eyes.
"Indeed, my lord. You would be an American, correct?"
I had to chuckle at that question. I hadn't really thought much about how I'd classify myself now. I was definitely not the same kid who had left Earth. It hadn't actually been that long, chronologically speaking, but inside my head, it felt like several years had passed. Either way, there was no point in bringing all that baggage up right now.
"Yeah, I guess that's as good of a label as any. I'm guessing you're from England."
He seemed puzzled by my vague answer to his question, but to his credit, he only paused for a second before getting back to the point.
"Indubitably. My residence is the Tower of London. I am one of the royal ravens. I was bequeathed the human name Arthur by those who tend to my brethren."
When he finished, he did a funny little maneuver that looked like he was giving a regal bow.
"Well, ain't you fancy pants."
I figured I'd better return the favor and give myself a proper introduction as well. I grabbed the front rim of my hat, giving it a slight tug, while I spoke.
"Name's William, but most folks call me Willie or Bill. You can call me whatever you'd like. It's nice to meet you, Arthur."
Arthur seemed to like my self-introduction because his eyes sparkled as he hopped around a bit on his branch.
"William is a strong English name, Sir. I shall certainly remember it. Now that we have been properly introduced, could you perchance enlighten me as to our whereabouts? I simply cannot find any familiar landmarks."
"Well, that's because we ain't on Earth anymore, Arthur. We are out among the stars, in space."
Arthur stared at me blankly for a few moments, most likely trying to process what I had just said. Eventually, he seemed to make up his mind about something because he breathed out a sigh before letting loose with the most well-mannered complaint I could've possibly imagined.
"Oh, dear. I suppose I shall be late getting home in that case."
I couldn't help it. I just bust out laughing. The whole situation was ridiculous, and I felt for the little guy, but I wasn't in the mood to get into the nitty-gritty of space, the Demon Lords, and whatnot right now. Since he seemed like the type to take things in stride, I decided to impose on his good nature until I could get Gilda to do the explaining. Besides, there was something I was much more interested in.
"So, are you some special kind of raven, Arthur?"
"Yes, quite. We ravens of the Tower are responsible for maintaining the stability of the British monarchy."
"Huh? Sound's like a big job for a little fella like you. I guess you'd need some serious magic power to take care of something like that..."
Arthur just stared at me, with what I could only guess was another blank look.
"Pardon me, Sir. When you inquire about magic, do you perhaps mean like the legends and fairy tales?"
"Sure, yeah. You're not the first magic animal from Earth I've met here."
"Ah. I feel it wise to clarify for the record that I am in no way magical. Despite my duties and station, I am simply a raven. I was under the impression that magic was not real."
It was my turn to stare blankly at him. I didn't think he was messing with me. Which left more questions than answers in my mind.
"If you ain't magical, then how come you can speak English?"
"I do not believe I am speaking English. I am simply speaking just as I always do... though it is odd. You are the first human who has ever understood me so clearly. Are you perchance a wizard, Sir?"
I didn't even know where to start. This guy came up and started a conversation with me like it was the most normal thing in the world to do, even though he'd supposedly never had a conversation with a human before. Still, here we were.
"Yeah, I suppose I am something like a wizard. Or at least I can use magic some. But I didn't use magic to speak to you... Eh, I guess it doesn't matter. We got bigger fish to fry right now."
"Yes, quite. I think being able to converse like this is rather pleasant, actually. However, I am much more concerned about what I am supposed to do now."
"Yeah, well. There's a pretty alien lady who can fill you in on the details. I'll take you to see her once I get done with what I'm supposed to do here."
"Oh! That would be splendid. What is the task you must complete?"
I evilly smirked at the gentlemanly bird as I said in my most intimidating voice.
"I'm going to conquer this here dungeon and get me a fantastic reward."
Arthur's eyes sparkled with interest.
"I daresay that conquest is something we Brits know a thing or two about. History and all that. If you do not mind, Sir, I would like to watch a real live wizard at work."
"Sure, I don't mind. Just be sure to stay outta harm's way. Things could get chaotic around me. Though, since you can fly, I guess you've got a big advantage there."
So, somehow I got a raven traveling companion on my trip through Cordie's specially made dungeon. It was only a minor speed bump, but it kind of threw me off my rhythm when he would suddenly start commenting on my battles.
"I say, that would definitely not be a pleasant way to die. I feel quite sorry for the petty villain."
As if there were many pleasant ways to die. Still, I didn't really respond to Arthur's commentary, so I imagined it was mostly like having a personal sports commentator at a gladiatorial fight. Besides that, watching him land on a few of the corpses to pick at them until eventually they vanished kind of turned my stomach. His commentary on that topic was also not helpful.
"These fellows taste nearly as bad as they look."
I really didn't need to know how they tasted, but Arthur seemed set on telling me every single thought that entered his head.
Eventually, he got bored with just commentary and started injecting himself into the fights. He was actually really good at distracting the goblins. He would swoop down behind them and peck the back of their heads, which would create openings for me to exploit. I'd never realized how distracting being attacked by a bird could be.
Eventually, as the numbers of goblins increased, a new type of enemy was mixed in. It was much larger, shaped like a bipedal boar, and packed on a lot more muscle than the wiry goblins. The identifier over its head simply said: Orc.
While the goblins used their usual hit and run tactics, the orc was much more aggressive. It wielded a large battle-ax but leaped at me with surprising speed for his size. However, thanks to my Augur skill, I could see his moves coming, so I easily avoided his first strike.
Because the orc was off balance due to missing me, he tucked into a forward roll, seemingly unfazed by the gash I left in his flank as he passed. Without missing a beat, he grabbed a goblin he had nearly collided with and, with just one arm, threw the poor creature right at me. While I easily dodged the screaming green projectile, the orc was already almost back on top of me. Arthur tried to help, but the orc just ignored his pecks. It looked like he couldn't really get at the skin through the orc's thick bristly hair.
The goblins were also around the periphery of our fight, taking shots at me whenever they thought they could. I felt like the idea of fighting without using my offensive magic was starting to become impossible. So I passed through some lightning magic when I managed to graze him with my sword. The orc apparently had poor resistance to lightning magic because his whole body went rigid for a second. Which was all I needed to sweep back around and behead him. The goblins were small fry without the orc, and soon enough, I was standing in a cluster of corpses, reading the notifications for my stats. I wanted to see what a creature like an orc was worth. I had fought stronger monsters, but strong creatures with human-like intelligence and trickery had to be worth something good. Unfortunately, I was disappointed because the orc was only worth 30 points.
I did keep the battle-ax, though. It was always good to have a backup weapon, and my inventory was the perfect thing to stow my new prize in. I started thinking it was really too bad that inventories were not available out in everyday life. In my head, I resolved to ask Cordie if she could teach me that bit of magic for real.
According to Arthur, the orc tasted much better than the goblins, but it just smelled like a common barnyard pig to me. To each their own, I guess.
While I ruminated on the nauseating topic, a familiar chime sound thankfully broke my train of thought. When I looked for the reason for the sound, I found Arthur with a system notification window floating directly in front of him. Arthur was starting to panic because the strange window followed him wherever he moved. He suddenly flew toward me, trying to escape the foreign object.
"Sir! Your assistance, please!"
However, when he tried to hide behind me, the window continued to chase him, and I was forced to snatch him out of midair for his own safety.
"Arthur! Calm down now. That there window ain't gonna hurt you. It's just trying to tell you something."
The panicked bird was staring at me with terrified eyes. I realized that maybe I shouldn't have been so rough. I slowly loosened my hold on Arthur and patiently waited for him to calm down. Eventually, he was calm enough to perch on my shoulder.
"I say, why would such a frightening object suddenly attach itself to me?"
"I dunno. What does it say?"
"I am merely a raven, Sir, and though of royal status, I have never learned to read."
I felt pretty stupid for forgetting that he was just a regular raven. I'd avoided looking at his window to give him some privacy, but it seemed I would need to be his translator.
"It says 'Congratulations! You are now level 2 - 120 experience points until you reach level 3. You now have 3 skill points. You may choose from the available skills on the list below. You may also choose to instead retain your skill points for the future.'"
I've been looking forward to introducing Arthur for months. Here is more info on the ravens of the Tower of London: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ravens_of_the_Tower_of_London
