Chapter 14 – Incompetence or bad luck?
A day had passed since my parents fought and my new routine was established: At least while Cassian and Alistair hadn't arrived, my mother gave lessons upon lessons on rhetoric, diplomacy, and etiquette.
The rhetoric and diplomacy classes were, basically, how I would debate with superior nobles without seeming like a threat or lacking etiquette. It wasn't a problem in itself for me, but rather a boring class that I had to disguise as if it were the greatest thing I could learn in the world.
My biggest problem, however, was the etiquette class... As if Cassian's demands weren't enough, now my mother is being a thousand times worse. If I deviated by a tiny detail, my mother would already complain; a real pain in the neck.
The arrival of my teachers that day yielded exactly what I already expected: more headache. The heated argument between them about my posture in the tournament ended up becoming just background noise, overshadowed by a surprising attitude from my mother. With unshakable coldness, Lady Ísis simply dismissed Monk Alistair and Master Cassian for eleven whole months, the exact half of my exile year. For her, what my tutors thought about me no longer mattered; what needed to be corrected was my diplomacy.
With the two of them out of the way, my official punishment began. During the first two weeks locked inside the city walls, I was entirely at her mercy. My mother monopolized every second of my day with those damn etiquette and rhetoric classes, without giving me a single opening to breathe. It was such a suffocation that I didn't have the slightest chance to step outside the castle to go to the guild and pick up any other mission.
My salvation only came in the middle of the month, when the requirement of my absolute seclusion finally expired. As soon as Lady Ísis ended the morning grilling and released me to circulate through Aritel, I didn't even wait for her to finish turning her back. I grabbed my bag with my leather magic circuits, and marched, almost running, along with Elara, toward the Adventurers' Guild. After fourteen days of swallowing nobility rules, I was boiling with the desire to blow up something other than my own patience.
Elara walked right beside me, with that relaxed but attentive posture. — Just try not to demolish the entire guild this time — she commented, breaking the silence with a tone loaded with sarcasm, as soon as we caught sight of the guild's rustic facade. — I don't have the patience to deal with the local guards if you decide the reception ceiling is a good target to relieve stress. —
— Very funny — I grumbled, rolling my eyes. — I just want a mission where I can use my real mana without someone giving me a lecture about the angle of my elbow. —
I pushed the heavy wooden doors with gusto. Immediately, the chaotic buzz of the hall hit me. The raw smell of malt beer, sweaty leather, and roasted meat flooded my lungs. Even though I didn't like the castle, the guild's aroma was infinitely worse than there.
As always, the adjacent tables were full of mercenaries and hunters sporting thick, battered leather clothes while talking loudly across the tables.
I rested my hands on the worn wood of the counter, feeling that I was finally in control of something. There she was, organizing some mission scrolls.
— Look who's arrived! Welcome, monster demolisher! — she greeted me with an attentive smile that barely contained her urge to laugh.
— Monster demolisher? —
— Yes, didn't you know? Your... "reputation", arrived very early, even having only done two missions! — Her voice was cracking, trying her best to hold back her laughter. — there have been recent rumors that you decimated over 50 rats in the Boar's Tavern while demolishing its basement! — She, involuntarily, began to let out contained laughs. — And... The same thing happened with a merchant... Only with slimes, and the target was the wagon — — Be careful not to destroy a noble's castle, alright. —
Not enough with that, Elara also commented, laughing. — That's why I tell you to be careful. Otherwise, you embarrass yourself! —
I was clearly awkward in that situation, because there was nothing I could say. After remaining static for a few seconds, I replied. — So is there any mission for me to "demolish" something that isn't needed? —
For a second, it seemed like I unnecessarily weighed down the mood, as if I had touched on a forbidden subject.
— Well, there is a mission from the guild itself to arrest or kill a band of renegades nearby who are charging a toll of coins for merchants to pass. — She sighed. — It's just that... I don't think it's cool for a child to do something like this. —
— I'm Rank C, remember? — I tried to reassure her, but then Elara interrupted me. — Rank C isn't much, and you're still a child. —
— Anyway, Sophia, what is the payout, and how far is it? — I asked.
— It's 100 gold coins divided among all group members. —
I was astonished, and at the same time confused. — A hundred gold coins?! But wait, what do you mean by "all group members"? — I thought, however, Elara was more direct. — How many people will participate in this group? And is there any information on how many bandits are there? —
— There are 6 people who will participate, including a Rank A person. — replied Sophia.
— It's a significant group. Lycon, are you going to participate? — Elara asked me.
— Better not... Last time that went wrong, didn't it? —
— It went wrong because you only know how to blow things up — this time there won't be any problems. You'll be able to blow things up at will since they are bandits. —
— Okay... — I confirmed, a bit hesitant. — But Sophia, when is this mission for? —
— Well... That's the only problem with the mission, if you were expecting something quick: The group plans to leave in 10 days. I can try to shorten the time but it will depend on the group's current leader. — She paused to take a breath. — Oh, and sorry for not answering the other question! The renegades' base is 4 kilometers away following the main road. —
— Well, it's doable. — I thought, before answering her. — Ok, I'll participate in this mission, but is there another one I can do right now? — I asked.
— Yes, there is, I'll go get it, but first. — She went to the other side of the counter, bringing back a large blue spherical crystal.
— Touch your cards here, this way you both will be registered in the guild's group. —
I took out my card showing Rank C and touched the crystal along with Elara. Her card showed 50 thousand MP, while mine showed 40 thousand.
— Whoa, my mana increased? And most importantly: Now I am sure Elara is Rank A. — I thought.
— You can put your cards away... — said Sophia, stopping for a second, attentive to Elara's card. — But look at that! A Rank A adventurer protecting our young demolisher! Now that raises a question for me? Are you sure it was Lycon who did all that? Wasn't it you? —
We put the cards away, after that, Elara, uncomfortable, answered.
— No, it was this little boy right here who made all the mess — now, can you just give us other missions? —
She nodded saying *— Ok —, running off to get the other available missions.
After a few minutes of waiting, Sophia returned saying, — Thank you for waiting so long! Here are the available missions where you can blow up the place while completing them. —
— Hey! — I thought, awkwardly. Right after, I took a look at the more than six missions available for me to take.
— There are many missions... and several good ones. — I reflected while looking at all of them. After a while, I made up my mind. I took the missions and thanked the attendant for them.
— Shall we go? — I asked Elara, while she was standing watching the missions I took.
— Yes. Which mission are you going to do first? — she replied, right after leaving her guard position to follow me.
— I think I'll do the barn mission. The owner no longer expects us to recover it, so I don't need to worry about anything other than getting rid of the problem. —
— In other words, you just need to blow up whatever is necessary, right? — she asked ironically. — it really is a great mission for you. —
We walked in a comfortable silence for less than an hour, crossing open fields and some scattered plantations, until the solitary silhouette of a large barn made of rotting wood appeared on the horizon. The thick smell of mold mixed with a vaguely acidic gas already plagued the wind, confirming that the fungi had taken over the place.
— It's no wonder the farmer didn't expect the barn back. Even if it were intact, he would probably have to rebuild it. — she commented, before giving a slight sigh. — Lycon, this is the perfect mission for you... But where is the owner? —
— Ah, ...I remember; We had to head to the manor — I show the mission paper, pointing specifically to an item. — "Meet me at XV hours in the afternoon at the manor indicated on the map" ... — I looked at the sky. — Right now it is... Noon... — I was perplexed for a while, unable to react for a few seconds. After that, my head finally started working. — Besides being in the wrong place, we got the time wrong too!!! — I yelled, furious with myself and thrashing on the ground.
Elara's reaction, however, made me even more furious. Instead of trying to console me or something of the sort, she started laughing loudly, barely able to contain herself.
— Why are you laughing?! —
— And shouldn't I laugh? I'm watching a child thrashing on the ground because everything went wrong... It's laughing to keep from crying. —
— Ah, damn it! The world hates me — Right after I finished saying that, I stepped in a mud puddle on a farm, where they were planting a plant that forms a thick cover that prevents the soil from getting muddy even under heavy rain, and that mud made me slip and fall on my butt on the ground. Making Elara laugh even harder.
I spent the entire next hour sitting on a dry log by the side of the road, sulking and trying, unsuccessfully, to scrape the mud stuck to the soles of my boots with a twig. To make my humiliation worse, the back of my pants was completely stained with brown dirt from the fall, giving me the ridiculous appearance of a brat who doesn't know how to walk in a straight line. Elara, in turn, spent those sixty minutes leaning against a wooden fence, letting out suppressed laughs every time she looked at my dirty butt.
We followed the dirt trail that cut through the plantations until we caught sight of a rustic two-story manor with peeling paint, which seemed to be at a safe distance from the infested barn. As soon as we reached the house's porch, the wooden floorboards creaked under my boots, announcing our arrival. The owner of the property, a bald, stout man with crossed arms and an expression of someone who hadn't slept well for days, came out the front door. He ran his eyes from Elara's gleaming armor straight to my dirt-stained pants, raising a suspicious eyebrow.
— Are you the one who's going to clear out those fungi? — asked the farmer, addressing Elara.
— No, actually it will be this little boy right here — answered Elara, pointing at me. — I just supervise him, to prevent him from making a mess. —
— Ehhh... Is the guild sending children to their deaths now? Ugh, he should be sweeping the city streets! — commented the farmer in a completely rude and harsh tone. — Well... If that's how it is then there's no other way. I just want you to get those fungi out of there. —
— Since you are distrusting me so much — a wicked smile appeared on my face — don't you want to see me cleaning up there? Don't worry, I won't hurt you. —
— O-O-Okay — confirmed the farmer.
While we were walking back to the barn, the farmer commented to Elara. — Is this boy okay? I think he's missing something in his head. —
— He's missing many things... Mainly common sense. —
I, observing the comments, replied. — I'm listening! —
The farmer fell silent immediately, while Elara struck a mocking pose, as if it didn't matter whether I heard what she said or not.
After a few minutes of walking, we arrived at the rotting barn.
— Well, this is it. Do whatever you want, I just want the fungi cleared. — said the farmer. In response, Elara and I answered in unison. — Okay. — Then we approached the place.
— These fungi are very problematic because at the slightest thing they blow up in your face. Only Rank A adventurers would be able to clear this without compromising the surroundings. — explained Elara.
— Then why is this mission Rank C? —
— Because he doesn't care about the barn, he just wants the fungi removed. —
— Well... If for any little thing the fungi explode... Then... — I asked Elara to step back a little, drew my mana blade, and conjured it with a bit of the mana I had.
The blade traveled for a second until it reached it. When it pierced the door and entered the interior of the rotting barn, one could hear the sound of several small explosions, which were joining together more and more.
In a few seconds, what should be some small explosions became a huge and thunderous explosion that incinerated even more fungi, creating several secondary explosion points around it. The main explosion reached over 40 meters in diameter, a true catastrophe.
The surrounding terrain, the barn, and the fungi had turned to dust in the face of that explosion.
— How cool! Several small explosions forming a larger minor explosion. I have to remember that. — I reflected while watching it expand, and feeling my clothes slightly singed.
The farmer was in shock, not so much because of the barn, but more because of the size of the explosion I managed to cause. Meanwhile, Elara was behind me, just watching me with some surprise on her face, but it still seemed like this was routine for her.
— L-L-Look... I-I-I'm sorry for insulting you. I didn't think you were that strong, a thousand pardons! — pleaded the farmer.
— There's no need. — I said, trying to calm the farmer's nerves.
— Lord Lycon is merciful. He won't kill you just because you insulted him. — interrupted Elara.
— L-L-L-LORD!!! — He took two steps back and bowed, trying to look as formal as possible.
— His body is less inclined than it should be... — wait, am I turning into my mother? — I thought, becoming slightly unsettled. Then I turned to Elara, who, at this point, was almost dying of laughter.
— Elara! Did you have to say I'm a noble? —
— Sorry, sorry. My tongue slipped. —
— You, you! — I already had a thousand and one curses in my head, but I couldn't say any of them to her.
The farmer no longer knew what to think, so I said. — I've already done the job, right? Could you bring my payment? —
— C-Certainly so, Lord Lycon! — he replied as he ran to get the coins.
After he went out of sight over the horizon, I asked Elara. — Was he making fun of me? "Certainly so" is redundant. —
— No, Lord Lycon. He is not like you who signs his own death warrant and still asks for a guarantee. —
— I got it. But hey, you don't need to call me lord! —
— Ok, Lord Lycon. —
— Hey! —
Elara started laughing at the situation while we waited for the farmer to return with the payment.
After a few minutes of waiting, the merchant returned with a pouch of coins.
— P-P-Please, accept this. — he stammered as he placed the pouch in my hands, and then ran off in despair, tripping over his own feet.
— My goodness. Everyone here is dramatic. Elara is dying of laughter and he looks like what I wanted to do with Alistair. — I thought. Right after, I took out my guild card. The history clearly showed: "Mission The Barn of Explosive Fungi Completed", but when I went to open the bag, there weren't the 5 gold coins that were on the job listing, but rather fifteen gold coins.
— Sir, you paid me extra! WAIT! — I tried to call him, but he was already too far away to even hear me.
Elara, after recovering from the endless laughs she had during the whole situation, tried to change my sulky face. — See, Lycon, at least you got an extra reward for your effort. —
— But I didn't do anything special. — I answered her.
— "Anything special", simply blowing up a barn as if a fire dragon had come here is nothing special, right. —
— But that was the fungi's doing. —
— Whatever, but who the hell throws that much mana just to start the reaction? What you did was the same as lighting a fuse by shoving it inside a smelting furnace! —
— Huh, but I didn't even use that much mana. — I contested, but still in doubt. — I only used a little bit of mana. Besides, how do you know how much mana I use since only mages or sorcerers can have any notion of that? —
— "A little bit" ... — she let out a laugh and then a long sigh. — Let's just go do another mission. Which one do you want? —
— Let's do the one that's close to here. This one is asking us to deal with some half-meter long spiders... Is this right? —
— Yes, go on. —
— Ok... The mission is basically that. The half-meter spiders invaded a settlement where the workers of another farm live, and they are paying 3 gold coins to whoever manages to eliminate them. —
I put the fifteen gold coins in my bag and turned my back to the smoking crater we left behind. The walk to the neighboring farm's camp should take less than half an hour cutting through the dirt shortcuts, which would be a peaceful stroll if I weren't wearing brown-stained pants and every step my boots didn't make an annoying splosh of drying mud. Elara walked a little further ahead, clearing the way with an enviable naturalness, and occasionally looked back just to check if I wasn't going to slip again or decide to vaporize some other agricultural structure out of pure boredom.
As we approached the mission coordinates, the agricultural landscape gave way to a cluster of abandoned rustic wooden cabins.
— How strange. It really is abandoned here, but I don't see anything danger— — — Watch out! — interrupted Elara, cutting a sticky silk thread.
— What is that? — I asked her.
— They are the webs of those damn spiders. They are like silk threads, but extremely sticky — look around you. —
I looked to one side, and to the other, noticing that besides that thread, several others connected the roofs of the cabins to the branches of the surrounding trees, forming a colossal web that covered almost the entire camp.
When I fixed my gaze ahead of me, I saw not one or two, but four half-meter long spiders among the webs.
— Lycon, if you want to use anything that doesn't blow up the cabins, you can use it! —
Before I could do anything, they turned their multiple eyes toward me and Elara. Two of them used their webs to make a swooping attack leaning on their own silk, while the other two used them to glue my boots and hers.
My bodyguard, seeing this, dodged sideways and tried to strike right at the spider's thorax, but it used its legs to deflect the dagger, hitting her abdomen.
Unfortunately, I was glued by the silk.
— What the?! — I said, frustrated. The other two spiders that glued me were now tempted to attack me, since I was immobilized.
— I'm going to die if it continues like this! — I thought, terrified of those atrocities. I drew my Wind Gust circle and, in an instant, I shot up more than 20 meters into the air, managing to see everything quite clearly.
— The situation is really ugly... I'll conserve a little mana. — I thought.
Even so, I ended up not conserving any mana at all; I drew my 4 Mass Fire circles to create a veritable hell of projectiles. The surrounding webs were completely obliterated, and it must have hurt the spiders a lot, seeing as there were several fractures on their carapaces.
However, the situation only got worse for us. From up high, I heard a squeak in chorus, followed by about 20 half-meter long spiders heading right to the place where I had bombarded everything.
— Did I by any chance say to summon the entire troop of monsters, Lycon?! — I heard Elara ranting.
The air around the camp suddenly becomes heavy, and the pure metallic smell dominates the environment. A deafening roar, so loud it makes the ground shake and the wood of the cabins hum, echoes through the clearing. A colossal lightning bolt plummets from the sky straight into the middle of the wave of spiders. The electricity not only strikes the ground; it branches out into chaotic currents, jumping from one target to the next.
When the dust settled, about 10 spiders had been completely roasted. The impact is so violent that they don't even scream; their carapaces simply burst open, leaving behind only charred exoskeletons, twisted legs, and a dense smoke with a terrible smell of burning fur.
Faced with a divine explosion that annihilated almost half the swarm at once, their aggressiveness evaporates. The remaining fourteen spiders brake, skidding on the dirt, turn around in a chaotic panic, and disappear desperately into the forest.
With that, I could return safely to the ground.
— Phew... Elara, how are things over there? Are you okay? — I asked when I reached the ground.
— Well I am but... — she gave a slight sigh — you used a ton of mana in the barn, another ton to fly backward like an idiot just now, an absurd amount to shred the roof, and I don't even have a notion anymore of how much you used in this lightning bolt. —
She put her hand to her forehead. — Now I understand why the nobles are afraid of you... How much mana do you have? —
— Huh, didn't you see my card back then? —
— I usually don't pay attention to that. —
— It marked 40 thousand MP there. —
— That explains it. Anyway, why did you spend so much mana on a task that only pays three gold coins and isn't even Rank C, it's Rank B? —
— Wait, is it Rank B? —
— Of course! Who the heck would send a rookie to fight twenty-five half-meter spiders? It doesn't make sense, does it? —
— But it wasn't even that difficult for it to be Rank B. —
— You are a special case. Besides, you must be exhausted, right, from having used so much mana. —
— I am — I sat on the ground. — but at least I was able to vent, I needed that... And not remember my mother complaining about the angle of my elbow anymore. —
The walk back into the city lasted much longer than the trip there, since my legs felt made of lead and the adrenaline had completely vanished. — My legs are bad but... It's nothing I can't handle. — I thought while walking.
When we finally crossed the gates of our property and entered the main hall, the silence of the environment was drastically broken.
My mother froze in her tracks as soon as she saw me. My boots formed mud puddles on the expensive rug, the back of my pants was still brown with dirt, my shirt had scorch marks from the barn explosion, and my hair was messy, full of dust and spider web remnants.
— Lycon! By the gods of light, what happened to you?! — she exclaimed, completely losing her coolness and running up to me with wide eyes. — Were you attacked by an army?! —
— No, Mom, I'm fine. I just went... to do some guild missions. — I replied, trying to sound casual, despite dragging myself with exhaustion. — There was a barn with fungi that turned into a forty-meter crater. Oh, and some twenty-four giant spiders tried to eat us, but I fried most of them with a lightning bolt striking from the sky. The usual. —
She put her hand to her chest, horrified, probably processing the absurd danger of the situation and the total lack of etiquette of a lord returning home looking like he rolled in a burning pigsty. But before she could start the lecture, a deep, thick laugh echoed from the staircase.
Baron Horus descended the steps with a huge smile on his face. He looked at my deplorable state, then at Elara — who simply shrugged, silently confirming my crazy story —, and stopped in front of me.
— An entire barn and twenty-something spiders? And you are still standing? — he asked, ignoring Lady Ísis's despair.
As an answer, I opened my leather bag with a tired but proud smile, letting him see the metallic gleam inside.
— And I still managed to get fifteen gold coins today. —
My father's smile grew even wider. He gave a heavy, friendly pat on my shoulder, which almost made me collapse on the floor from how exhausted I was.
— Fifteen coins in a single day's work? That's my boy! — he praised, full of pride, crossing his arms. — Excellent work, Lycon. I like seeing that initiative. Now go take a bath and rest before your mother ends up dying of worry. —
